Love, Life, and eventful weekends.

Lovely...

Well I had a very eventful weekend. It was busy, Filled with a birthday party (my sisters), Halloween party, and GoCarting with pineview boy. Yes, me and him are working on things. I realized how dumb I was being and that I couldnt live without him for very long, actually more like I didn't want to. Love always finds its way. The funny thing is I find us getting stronger. That's what arguments do to couples I guess. I know nothing about love and how to keep it strong. All I know is how to feel it. With pineview boy I feel nothing else. I'm getting sick of calling him Pineview boy. First reason is because I swore to myself to be always honest on my blog. Second reason is I dont even call him that in real life. I'd call him pookie before ever calling him pineview boy. So I'm just gonna come out and say it. His name is Trevor. Trevor Milarski :) and he is the most amazing man I have ever met. He lights up a room easily. I cant figure out if it's his smile or the way he makes everyone laugh. He is my best friend. Well my second best friend, Emily came first. Plus he is a different kind of best friend because he's also the love of my life. Its funny how many times I have said someone was the love of my life. When growing up you think that every guy who gives you butterflies or buys you flowers is the love of your life. I was naive to have been one of those girls who felt like that. We all go through that though. I am young and still trying to figure out who I am, who I want to be. I am pretty sure Trevor is the one though, they say that you'll feel different when you know. Boy do I feel different. I can tell him anything without being scared he will get mad. I can be myself. I think a lot of our problems were do to my own self consious ways. I was afraid that things would turn out like my past. I was afraid that I am to broken for someone to actually love me, or for me to love someone back for that matter. I was afraid of becoming my mother, dating the wrong, crappy men for the rest of my life. The thing is though, love is a choice, love is opening up to someone. Letting go and trusting them. Dealing with the crazy things they do sometimes. Dealing with the things you dont always like. If dealing with those things means a lifetime with Trev then you got yourself a deal. I cant remember a time when he wasn't here for me. He always have been since we met. Trev has chosen to love me, thats something remarkable. Who would have thought that someone could handle my wild untamed spirit? He does a good job of putting up with me. Of loving me. I think that means I owe it back to him to love him unconditionaly no matter what problems we face. I am trying. I feel myself and our relationship growing stronger every day. I learn from him how to be a better version of myself. He makes me happy everyday. :) This weekend was a fun one, mostly because I spent time with the people I love, laughing and just enjoying being young. Life is short, I also realized that this weekend. I lost a friend in a car accident, and found out a friend also got hurt in the same accident. Your life can change in a blink of an eye. So open up yourself to people. Dont be afriad to fall in love with someone. Its better to have loved, than not to have loved at all.  Take chances on people. You never know where it might get you. Also live your life, espcially for those people you have lost. They would want you to be happy for them, to go on living because you never know what day is your last. They would want you to remember that one day you'll see them again. Be happy, stay young, and live your life to its very fullest, spending time with those who matter most.