Love is in the air.

Soulmates?

I am not sure how I feel about this idea. Are you really destined to be with someone or is being "in love" a state of getting used to having someone around? I thought I had love all figured out,that my prince would arrive at my doorstep and I'd know with out a shadow of a doubt that he was the one. Wrong. So so wrong. As you know I have grown to be quite a love skeptic. How can I not be, tons of failed relationships and here I am. Not only that, you are capable of loving more than one person aren't you? So how does that work out? How is one person going to be "the one" for the rest of forever, when there are tons of other people cabable of loving them too? I fully believe that love is a choice, a full out hard, sometimes heartbreaking decision. You get to pick who you decide to be with dont you? Well then you must be able to pick who you stay with also. We are mammals, so what makes us so different then other mammals? Besides the fact that we have a language and walk on two legs instead of four. I believe that we are just the same in the "mate" aspect also. Its not all about feelings. Its about who would produce a good gene in an offspring, who would be faithful, and even who would support the family. We just allow our feelings to portray this for us. We say it hurts and we cant let go because we "love" them, but doesn't it really come down to the fact that we just spent so much time with them that we have become emotionaly attached? After a breakup it hurts like hell for so many months and then after a while you are ready to be single and mingle, once again looking for this perfect mate. If it wasnt for the feelings aspect, dont you think you could move on quickly? Isn't that the thing we always claim that holds us back from moving on? I think its a sad excuse to make finding someone a  more extravigant task than it actually is. Think about it, we find this so called person we are in love with, we get married to show other susepctable mates that we are no longer available, then we mate to raise our population, have offspring who then start this cycle all over again. I dont think love plays as big of a part as we think it does. I think its attachment, we start to rely on this person, doing daily tasks with this person, expecting them to be there for us in a time of need. We start to rely on them in some of the same ways we rely on our own parents. When this person leaves and decides its not working out for them we feel anxious, scared, torn apart, even lost because we dont have that safety net anymore. Isn't it true that even if your the one who ends the relationship you feel just as much emotional pain, so much so that you consider getting back with the person that you clearly said wasnt your type in the first place? I think its a vicous cycle of getting attached to someone and then not being able to just let go even though the relationship is toxic for you. It has nothing to do with "love" or that you were meant to be so you keep going back to them. No. This is just an easy, skewed way of telling people that you got emotionally attached and now you can't let go. It sounds more normal and romantic than saying that you picked that person for a mate and allowed yourself to get to close to soon so you became dependent on them. If you didnt become so dependent on this person do you think that you could let them go easier? Probably,but how can you not depend on them? Your looking for a mate, someone to help you reproduce and then help you survive the rest of you life. I think that is even more romantic and heartbreaking than the "love" concept we have gotten into our heads. We are all just animals, looking for a mate to depend on, and that isn't such a bad thing to think about in my opinion. If you looked for "love" in this mindset I wonder if it could even be easier to find that "special" someone, because now it no longer becomes just an emotional state it is now a state of life..