Saturday, January 21, 2017

The sheep and the wolf.

Sometimes

I feel like a wolf and sometimes I feel like a sheep. There are days when there are heavy mixtures of both running through my veins. I am bold, and howl at the moon in the middle of the night stalking prey. However, I am also weak and fleeting, ready to run at the first sound that radiates within my eardrums. Its hard being both a sheep and a wolf. I often wonder if sometimes the two take on opposite roles within me, if sometimes the wolf is weak and vulnerable and the sheep is the one who stands its ground. I dont have many predators, just admires. Its hard to hate a wolf for hunting or sheep for being helpless, they both do what they can to keep me thriving, surviving. I battle the wolf and the sheep within my soul daily. There is this urge to run free, to growl at those wanting to caress my fur and tame my heart. Then there is an urge to stay still, cower down and convert to having an owner who can shave my fur and sell it for the highest penny. Do you have a sheep and wolf within your soul? Who takes over your mind when you have to make a heavy decision? Mine is both. Damn it is it both. Both the wolf and the sheep within me go to battle and there is bloodshed every. single. time. When a wolf hunts a sheep, often times the sheep will be so terrified that it will lead itself to its own death by accidentally running of a cliff or right into the teeth of the wolf. The wolf in me will camouflage itself behind a bush waiting for the sheep to come out. However, often if in a group, a sheep may be capable of stampeding a wolf and stomping it to death. I am often a sheep who stands alone and my strategy is to run from the wolf, pleading surrender.  They both have their strategies and I weigh them both heavily. "In this situation do I deserve to be a wolf or to be a sheep?" This is the question I ask myself often and hardly ever have an answer. To be sensitive or not sensitive. I think we all have versions of animals within our souls who battle. Its funny though, because often I find that the wolf and the sheep are both battling over the same cause, to survive, thrive and be happy the best they know how. Do not kill the sheep or the wolf that is inside your soul, because often you may need to be both and that is ultimately okay. Be the sheep and be the wolf.

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