Penciling in Love

Who says

that we can plan love. I dislike those people who go around saying that "it just wasn't the right timing', "I cannot commit to you in this time of my life" or "I am just not ready". When do you ever have time to prepare for love? When was it a scheduled event that you pencil into your calendar and tell yourself that "by this date, I will love you, I will commit." Screw that and all the cop out excuses. Tell me the real reason. Tell me that you are hurting that you are scared, that the last relationship you were in tore you to pieces and left you crumbled. Tell me the damn truth because I deserve that dont I? Speaking of deserving, dont you dare tell me what I deserve. "You deserve more than I can give you" I know what I deserve and its my choice on if I find it or if I settle. It is not your decision to tell me what I deserve. Are you telling me this to make yourself feel better, to make yourself feel like you are doing the right thing? STOP. stop planning, stop justifying. because whether its today, tomorrow or two years from now, whether its with me or someone else, you will fall in love, many times or maybe just once. You will meet someone and you will like them more than you expected and you will have to decide. Are you going to be a coward? Are you going to run, because if you do there is no turning back. You walk out that door and you sever ties. You say things like "it just isn't the right time" "I cant give you what you deserve" "I am trying to find myself" and its over. Just like that. Pain comes with love and if you expect that your cop out excuses will save you, you are dead wrong.  I see right through you. It hurts letting go just as much as it does falling and you are lucky enough if you are able to do it, if you are able to stop the morning texts, the late night conversations, the laughs. Man up, love does not come easy and if you think you are going to schedule it for when "the timing is right", think again. If you walk away you are a coward. A coward for not trying, for not facing the chance of pain dead in the eyes and taking a chance. I was worth it, the chance of love is always worth it. You have survived pain before, you can survive anything you just have to have the guts to jump in and  face it. If you dont, your cop out excuses will not save you. This one, this loss, is on you darling.